I keep telling myself to post more often....we'll see if that happens. 

I've noticed that my xanga gets about 5 visitors a week...i wonder who these people are  =/
no one every leaves me comments so i have no clue.

So then to bring things up to date. I've finally escaped kentucky. That state shall hence forth be called "tucky" and not allowed to use my name. Currently my mother and i were both accepted into an abuse shelter. It was nice to get out of my isolated redneck mountain prison yet ive just replaced it with a prison inside the city.
I've been getting out more and actually have my friends back now so its not the end of the world. But the rules and regulations i have to deal with now are riddiculous. I'm 24 and have a 8pm curfew on weekdays.....I have to go to bed at 11pm. I have to mark down on a sheet everything i'm going to do for that week and each thing has to be ok'd or i cant go. No visitors. No electronics.   Theres lots more to complain about that they make me do but i really dont feel like adding it all.

  All they really do though is provide food and shelter. Plus excessivly in every way tell you to go get a job NOW NOW NOW. I've been looking for one for over a month now, and just like before i'm having a really hard time finding one. Those 3 years stuck in nowhere, plus the year of college, then the year of helping my mom raise my aunts kids,and then the part where i had a hard time with a job search before that.

I have no recent job experience for six years.....no one wants to hire me.

I dont know what to do anymore. At everyturn in my life i fail. I've succeeded at absolutly nothing my entire life.
a harsh yet true statement.

Recently I've joined a site called Faqqly. Seen here: http://www.faqqly.com

It's pretty fun, people asking you questions and then you can ask complelty random people questions about whatever you feel like.

It's new so the majority of people I've invited have all declined saying somthing along the lines of "I wont ever spend enough time to take care of it". How sad for me  Oh well it's still fun.

-------

Something I hear a lot from people is, "Why don't you move to (insert their home city/state/country/province)".  Every time I hear it I actually consider it. Anyone who knows me, knows I'm incrediably unhappy where I am now. I don't have friends or family to tie me down either. So why not move someplace new and just restart everything? My biggest question is how do you move someplace far off without having money to start with? Is it even possible in this day and age? I mean sure I could walk there and be a homeless person  but what about my stuff. I'm addicted to the net I can't leave this computer.

Well I'm off to poll people on Faqqly about what things I might need to know if i moved to california.

                     Maybe I'll lighten up and even turn this into a legitimate blog/journal and make real posts. Not just rants about my problems that no one wants to read. Although it does help get it out of my system.

Currently I'm feeling rather down. Absolutly nothing holds my interest anymore. I feel that everything is going too slow for me yet the days fly by. So as I sit here making no progress life passes me by.

To make it worse I also feel I no longer have any friends. No one calls, no one even talks to me without prodding from me first.  I'm being forgotten and left behind by everyone i knew. Well thats not completly true. I do have someone online. We consider each other family....heh my net-sister.  She wants me to play world of warcraft with her so bad shes trying to send me a copy of the game.

However with plenty of past experience the package will most likly never come. Even with my unlimited paitence I dont know what to do in this situation of isolation.

This is a rundown of my day for the past month"

4pm - get up

4:20pm to 7am - get online while watching tv

7:30am to 4pm -sleep

Sprinkle with random eating times and bathroom breaks and thats my day.

......I want the hell out of here.

 I don't feel like adding much right now except that i've moved again. We moved farther out into the countryside now. The only exception is we now have a phone, internet, and satalite tv. for now anyway.

My phone number is: 606-337-8938

and the address: 5775 Hwy 1595

                  Frakes KY, 40940

since only like two people glance at my journal when i post i feel safe putting those there.

Well here I am again. I've had the opportunity to make a post a few times before now but just was never in the mood but here it is now <.< . 

 Continuing from last time, talking about myself and trying to explain my personality. Like I said it's not really an easy thing to do. I remember way back in junior high school, several of my friends were sitting a table trying to figure out who in our group of friends belonged to which social group. For example  my friend David is a preppie person (eew I know) and my friend Chris is a drunk frat nerd. However when I sat down they all looked at me and explained that for the past ten minutes they were trying to figure out what group I was in....here it is about 7 years latter and still no answer.
Sometimes I dress nice and sometimes laid back, occasionally Goth.  I get along with all groups and well with both sexes. So well in fact that the friends I have are usually willing to go out of their way to include me in the things they do even though I don’t have money.
 A prime example of that is after Christmas  some of my friends are coming to pick me up and let me stay with them for a week just to play games. They will pay for gas for the 6 hour trip both ways  and food for the week.  However if I know my friends I might end up staying longer at other peoples houses as they pass me around to get their Kenny fix.
 
 Recently .... I’ve been thinking about getting a new girlfriend. I want one pretty bad. even though not being attached to anyone has its good points right now. I don't think it's going to happen because I still have no money or car and on top of that I really really don’t want any of these redneck hillbilly backwoods girls around here. I like the city life with visits to the forest not vice versa.

hee back on topic. lets talk about my pride and vanity. I have an exceptional amount of both ()<.<
usually that’s a bad thing but since I keep myself in check and get along with people it doesn’t usually cause problems. my pride is very deserving though, I have pride in my large self esteem, immunity to peer pressure, and lack of anger.  Now vanity is another issue. I go without getting a haircut for up to 7 months at a time and let me tell you my hair looks horrible at shoulder length. I've always wanted really long hair but that wont happen because of the in between time where I look like a scrub. but still whenever I see a mirror I check my hair as if I could improve it heh. but yet I’m still vain because I know when I go and take care of myself with nice cloths, haircut, shave. I always turn heads =p My name even means "Handsome" in English anyway. It's "Born of Fire" in Gaelic? or Celtic? I forget, and its "Sword" in Japanese. =D
 On that note I don't photograph well even when I get cleaned up. I have never had a good picture taken of me in my entire life. One reason is my full smile looks terrible. I have rather pointed teeth so when I show them in a smile it looks more like I’m about to bite someone RRaaawwwRR

 Ok that’s enough for this post I guess, I may or may not continue about myself next time. It all depends on if someone responds and lets me know they are reading. If no one does I might just start posting more random things like surveys and random story’s that pop into my head ( I might do that anyway they're usually funny)  
                                                                               

               {}xxx[]__________/      Ken of Blades